So I read this last night and it's lovely. And I'm proud of what I've done. But also, THIS is why it doesn't make me feel better. ☺
First, if you list all the things after the fact, it sounds ok, but I know how much I could have done and didn't. Sometimes I think my most creative accomplishment has been convincing people I'm not wasting all my time. (Which is a phrase I hate, but maybe that's another post). And second, (and this is just bt us, haha) I think I'm an art snob. I mean, I'm not when it comes to other people--and even in my own head, I'm like "make a beautiful life and you'll have done something worthwhile," but there's a part of me that will settle for nothing less than esoteric accomplishment. My ongoing inability (and lack of motivation) to write makes me feel like... well, not good, no matter how many walls I whitewash or lavender I plant.
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Date: 2017-06-27 11:57 am (UTC)First, if you list all the things after the fact, it sounds ok, but I know how much I could have done and didn't. Sometimes I think my most creative accomplishment has been convincing people I'm not wasting all my time. (Which is a phrase I hate, but maybe that's another post). And second, (and this is just bt us, haha) I think I'm an art snob. I mean, I'm not when it comes to other people--and even in my own head, I'm like "make a beautiful life and you'll have done something worthwhile," but there's a part of me that will settle for nothing less than esoteric accomplishment. My ongoing inability (and lack of motivation) to write makes me feel like... well, not good, no matter how many walls I whitewash or lavender I plant.
I'm seriously the worst. ugh.